Reasons Married Women Seek Sexual Pleasure Outside Marriage

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Buddy
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Reasons Married Women Seek Sexual Pleasure Outside Marriage

Post by Buddy » Wed Apr 27, 2011 8:55 am

It is no longer a taboo today to see women possessing an insatiable sexual appetite, and the moment these cravings are not met, the tendency to seek where it is available is high. The other Thursday, I paid a visit to a famous shop in Victoria Island, Lagos. As I was about to enter the store, I noticed a vendor’s van neatly parked not too far from the store. As I moved nearer, the salesman, who was singing the praise of an aphrodisiac for women with a microphone, came out. To my surprise, a number of women crowded round this man to examine the products in the public. Before now, such is not common, but the times are changing fast.

Imbalance in the sexual drive is the number three culprit married women seek sexual pleasure outside their marriage. I’ve seen what happens to marriages when husbands have little or no desire for sex and the wife yearns for it desperately. A recent visitor to my office said, “Please help me. I’m 28, married with a three-year-old daughter. For the past three years, my husband has avoided being sexual with me. We have gone from having sex twice a week to, if I’m lucky, once in two month now. I’m miserable and I can’t keep on living like this; sex means a lot to me.”



One out of every three couples struggle with problems associated with low sexual desire. One study found that 20 per cent of married couples have sex less than 10 times a year. In addition, low sexual desire is not only “a woman’s thing.” Many sex experts believe that low sexual desire in men is the world best-kept secret.



People with low sexual desire are generally married to partners who want more sexuality, intimacy, physical closeness, and connection. Sex is an extremely important part of marriage. When it is good, it offers couples opportunities to give and receive physical pleasure, to connect emotionally and spiritually. It builds closeness, intimacy, and a sense of partnership. Husband, if your libido is waning, remember that your most powerful sexual organ is your brain. In order to feel more sexual, you first have to accept that a loving, satisfying sex life is important in a marriage. Then commit to finding your untapped sexuality within.



Men, even highly ‘sexed’ husbands, experience occasional lows in their sex drive. However, there are many reasons to stretch oneself for solution when a husband’s libido is nowhere to be found because unsatisfying sexual relationships often cause disaffection, isolation, division, alienation, infidelity, and divorce.



In most relationships, the spouse with the lower desire sets the pace for the sexual relationship, controlling when and how it happens. Am I saying you should have sex any time your spouse desires or that you should go through the motion just to keep the peace? No!



Many husbands with lower sex drives are essentially saying, “I know you’re sexually unhappy. I won’t do anything about that, but I still expect you to remain faithful.” Can you see what is wrong with this picture? When you decide to make sexuality more important, you and your wife will become more emotionally connected and you can trust her sincerity. You will not only feel closer to your wife, you may also discover your sexual appetite has not really vanished; it was merely camouflaged probably as a result of stress, sickness or work. Knowing why you are not so interested in sex will not boost your desire, doing something about it will.


By Funmi Akingbade

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Re: Reasons Married Women Seek Sexual Pleasure Outside Marri

Post by Buddy » Wed Apr 27, 2011 9:00 am

Now, let us look at some possible way out. You can adopt the ‘old Nike slogan solution’ which says, ‘Just do it.’ Are you wondering, how? Will having sex when I’m not in the mood boost my desire? Human sexuality experts once assumed all people experienced sexual desire in a similar way – something triggers a sexy thought, which triggers an urge to act. Sexual stimulation then makes you feel aroused. However, recent studies show that for some husbands, sexual desire does not precede arousal, it actually follows it. Some husbands rarely (or never) find themselves fantasizing about sex, but when they become sexual with their wives anyway, they become aroused. Once aroused, there is a desire to continue.



Just because a husband is not demanding sex does not mean he has a problem with arousal. Lots of husbands with a low sexual desire actually enjoy sex once they get started. Now listen, hormones don’t have to be raging; you don’t need an overwhelming feeling of passion. Many times, husbands with lower desire have sexual urges, they are just more subtle than their wives’. Husband, you may notice your wife looks great in her tight short jeans and have a fleeting thought about sex. The thought may not linger, but it is there. Rather than allow these moments go unnoticed, heed them and act on them fast.



Quickly seize the opportunity and take her there and then; march her straight to the bedroom. Make her bend over the side of the bed so her stomach and breasts are against the mattress and her feet are on the floor, legs spread comfortably. And you, the husband penetrates her from behind, lift her legs from just above the knees, hold them apart, and thrusts in and out. With her body angled slightly downward and her legs apart, you will get deep penetration. Moreover, since her hips are in your grip, you can thrust away with total abandon. In addition, you can easily view her sexy rear and watch yourself move in and out of her. Your manhood is perfectly slanting for her pleasure and when you are getting close to climaxing, shift your hands from her hips to her clitoris. This sudden but subtle adjustment will make for an extra lively ending as you gain even more control.

By Funmi Akingbade

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Re: Reasons Married Women Seek Sexual Pleasure Outside Marri

Post by Buddy » Wed Apr 27, 2011 9:02 am

Alternatively, you may decide to give her the stand and deliver sex still wearing her tight short jeans by making her lean against a wall with her legs slightly spread, facing you. Just grab the back of your wife’s thighs and hold them against your hips, lifting her up and pushing her back into the wall for an advantage, then thrust away as though you are cruising a new car. The fact that you both are up-close-and-personal, your wife’s cravings for face-to-face intimacy is fully delivered with guarantee. In addition, stand-up sex scratches that I-need-you-now itch that plagues passionate wives; this position is primal and versatile – perfect for a quickie. In addition, tell her to squeeze her thighs together: this will narrow her vaginal canal, which in turn enhances the friction you will feel.



Again, tell your wife to lie on her side with her arms above her head. With you on your side and your body perpendicular to hers, tell her to slowly raise her top leg, while you inch you lower body between her legs. Once you are joined at the groin, grab her shoulders while she anchors herself on the floor. This sideways sex position is one for the record books that you wife will not forget in a hurry! On top of the typical thrusting, you two can enjoy some serious shallow grinding. Moreover, this new entry angle allows you to explore every inch of her inner chamber, especially the often-ignored sides, providing you with an array of erotic. It will not take much to send your sex drive flying.


By Funmi Akingbade

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Re: Reasons Married Women Seek Sexual Pleasure Outside Marri

Post by Buddy » Wed Apr 27, 2011 9:03 am

Some husbands with low desire say they’re more interested in making love under certain conditions – at certain times of the week, after a huge contract, or a good raise at work, on vacation or after a long erotic massaging. Identify what is different about the times you feel more inclined, and take advantage of those moments. In other words, if cold baths turn you on, go into the shower or bathroom with your wife and act it out. Try acting more sexual.



Mr. Victor, a 42-year-old orthopaedic nurse, was in my office with his wife. After an intensive counselling session, he discovered the key to boosting his interest in sex was watching his wife bath/sleep naked under the duvet and watching erotic educative films together. This does not only heighten his interest in sex, but also draws him closer to his wife.

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Re: Reasons Married Women Seek Sexual Pleasure Outside Marri

Post by Buddy » Wed Apr 27, 2011 9:04 am

To those older husbands who are married to younger women. There will be times when you really don’t feel like having sex. Instead of just saying no or “I’m too old for that,” which feels like a rejection to your wife, offer an alternative. You could say, “Come have sex with me,” or “Honey, my body needs a massage after which I’d love to go on a sex trip with you.”



Remember, sex is a gift; make up your mind to give the gift of being sexual even when you don’t feel like it. Some studies suggest that a high percentage of men say their sex drive is not what it used to be before initiating sex but after initiating it, the sex drive skyrockets.

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Re: Reasons Married Women Seek Sexual Pleasure Outside Marri

Post by apyworld » Fri May 25, 2012 2:54 pm

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